It's been so busy, and we are fairly desperate for help. I don't know where to begin.
Mom's new doctor is trying his best to keep up with the complicated mess that my mother is. His office is being incredibly patient with Mom and I, calling and clarifying, and confusing the staff as Mom tells them different information than I do. Hopefully over time and with review of her medical records, they will see which history is more accurate. I am having an enormous problem with Mom giving false info wherever she goes, and becoming even more stubborn about "being right."
Case in point, the wireless and cable bill, which will now cost us $50 more per month, but she believes it will save us $5 per month, and she utterly refuses to fix the increase in cost of the DVR. We have been charged $39.99 for it for the last 8 months or so, but it was and should be $31.99 per month after the first year of promotional pricing. In addition, she ordered the newspaper again. I canceled it a few years ago because she never read them and they would pile up on the lawn and them go directly into the recycle trash can. She said she would order just the weekend papers, so of course, we are now getting newspapers every day. She has no idea how that happened, and this is also falling into the "let her hit rock bottom" theory so that someone who can make a difference can see she needs someone else to make her financial decisions. When I ask why she doesn't read them, she scoffs at me like I'm an idiot and says, "Because I'm SICK, Amber!" To which I usually reply, "In more ways than one, Ma."
She had an appointment with her new urologist, which was quite impressive. This doctor knew her stuff. She keeps up on current research and literature, and is very experienced in Mom's condition. She fitted her with a catheter to give Mom a break, and prescribed medication that we were told didn't exist by her old PCP, and learned that her had been mistreating her bladder condition the whole time. He was going based off of old data, which he seemed to do a lot. I hate the idea that Mom was suffering with constant pain for the last several years just because he didn't have the time to keep up with new information. I love the idea that she might be able to find relief with this specialist. However, the catheter bag is uncomfortable on Mom's leg and she keeps having accidents. I'm not sure if the bag leaks or if it's user error, but it's hard to keep up with and now she needs her bed changed and I have a broken washing machine that will not clean her sheets.
Since I am totally overwhelmed and have been needing a break for quite some time, the alzheimers association is being wonderfully incredible to me and allowing me to spend this next weekend with my cousins. It is a much needed (and, frankly, much deserved) break from chaos and Mom's emotional instability. I have a sore throat today, likely from the stress of the last several weeks and being constantly behind, and having Mom walk behind new and literally saying negative things in my ear all day long. There is so much to do and so little time, and I simply can't keep up with it all. Mom is more needy than ever, and even the dog had surgery and had to be babied for two weeks. The other caregiver is still out sick and we're trying to prepare for another craft fair. My car tags are due and I have no money, Mom ran up the credit card and won't tell me how, and some days are spent entirely on the phone fixing something the insurance confused or Mom confused or getting medical records from point A to point B. It's all just overwhelming and more than one person can do. I can't wait for the weekend and this sore throat better back off, because I will NOT let ruin the first break I've had since 2010.
We see her new GI on monday. They say that GI also means hepatologist, but I have a feeling that they will deem her too complicated and refer her back to the specialists at the hospital. The sooner, the better; I think that a lot of her mood swings are caused by HE and that it's still not under control. I have been able to let her mean comments go, but that seems to upset her even more. I think she wants to know that what she says matters to me, but then when she says something mean from HE, she cries over regret. No way to please her, so I'll just go on my little vacation and not let her craziness make me crazy.
I've been typing this on the tablet, in the car, with a dog on my lap and Mom in with her therapist. Things will be better. This too shall pass. Until it does, I'm hanging on by a thread.
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