Positively Exciting!

Changes are happening so fast and they are (about 99%) positive changes! Let's review:

1) Mom is still eating a balanced diet! Her ammonia level came down to 39! She told me that she will NOT let her mother's passing stop the progress she's been making and allow herself to stop eating again. She is grieving, but doing well, considering. We discussed her general health and well-being, and her cognition as of late. Though I do believe her poor memory and occasional confusion is a permanent condition brought on by the last few years of malnutrition and ammonia overload, I do believe she is making clear-headed decisions for herself (even if I don't always agree with the decision). Although she disagrees that she has any memory problems or confusion, I think that these issues can be addressed through therapy and behavioral changes that will help her to deal with the memory issues and allow me to learn how to speak to her so that she is not so easily confused. I have decided that I will not pursue the conservatorship unless/until she has another episode of hepatic encephalopathy, at which time it would be obvious and immediate that I would need and receive conservatorship over her. However, with the good streak she's on, she may never have another episode and it may never have to be done! So excited about that! I know it scared the living crap out of her, and I'd really hate to have to go through with scaring her that much, but I would do what is necessary to help my mother live a healthy, happy life. I am relishing the idea that (at least for now, and hopefully for now) conservatorship is unnecessary. 

2. I got a job. I start tomorrow (Monday). It's through the temp agency. It doesn't pay *a lot*, but it pays *enough for now*, and will help us keep afloat. It's a receptionist/office assistant position and local. They are reputed to be very nice people and easy to work with and for, and I'm excited to get back into the working world. It's not my forever-job, and not my dream job, but it's such a blessing in my life right now. I do believe this will help both me and my mother financially and emotionally. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, so maybe Mom and I will miss each other by the end of the work day and we can stop driving each other batty being stuck in these house walls. 

3. I hired a second caregiver. We've already worked out a schedule for this week. I love her positive attitude and outlook on life, and that she loves being a caregiver. She's also a single mother of two, so her and Mom have a lot to talk about (and the caregiver likes hearing the same stories over and over again, which is perfect for Mom's repetitive nature). I really think she'd be great for Mom and so far they seem to get along quite well. I'm hoping she can not only be a great caregiver, but help Mom form friendships and get her to be more social. Mom has given me two weeks to try this schedule out (it means she has someone here for 3 hours/day, 5 days/week or more if she has an appointment). She plans on panicking after that two week period. She insists I am not realistic about the cost of this and that we can't afford it. I think she's far too negative and not doing the math, and that we CAN afford it as long as I keep working. We have a small fund (I opened a checking account solely dedicated to Mom's caregiving - not to be spent on ANYTHING else) that we can pay from now, and as we sell her mother's things and the many (many, many) things in this house that we have on hand and been meaning to sell, the fund will grow. I also intend on putting a large portion (at least half, but maybe more) of my paycheck into the fund. I'm also starting an etsy store to sell the things I make (crochet/knit/craft). Mom will be taking the disabled bus on shorter trips, and the caregivers will accompany her until she gets used to riding on her own. This will save us money (when she rides alone) and allow me to continue working without having to take off time to take her to appointments a few times a week. Both caregivers are open to taking her to her specialist appointments in Loma Linda and keeping notes and open communication between all parties. The new caregiver is open to providing respite care so I can spend the night or a few days away, if/when I can afford it. So many good things are happening right now, and a lot of them mean money coming in and care being given to Mom, and me being out in the world and both of us being happier and healthier. I even have access to a free gym (thanks to a new friend who is so generous with such things).  I'm so hopeful that all of this works out and actually goes according to plan.  I'm bursting at the seams with happy. 

I hope everyone out there is living a wonderful life and having a great time. I know there are struggling friends and family, and you are in our prayers. I know some of you are healing from recent operations or medical conditions, and I send you healing vibes. Hugs to everyone and I always welcome comments and well wishes. Mom always welcomes calls (even if she's sleepy!) and is coming out her hermit shell and would like to start seeing friends again. She misses you!

Funeral Plans

If anyone needs any info on Angie's services, please contact me. Services will be held this Thursday, May 10th, at 11 am. There will be a viewing from 9 until the service starts, at which time the casket will be closed. The bishop from Angie's ward will speak at her service. Family and friends are invited to speak if they have any finals words and all are invited to meet at the bar & grill located behind the mortuary after the service.

I feel it inappropriate to post the mortuary name or address online, so again, if you have any questions, please let me know.

Mom had a doctor's appointment yesterday and all is well. Her ammonia level is at 46 (just under the max of 47) and all her other blood tests came out great. We tried cutting the water pills again, but it was too much and she gained some water weight. For now, we are instructed to raise the water pill dosage during the week and lower it on weekends. It's a balancing act and we will figure it out. I'm also learning quite a bit about low salt recipes and cooking, and we're working together to resolve issues regarding things like the dishes and cleaning and organizing and how to help each other make the house run smoothly. Mom is handling her mother's passing as best she can, but sometimes she is hysterical and she is hypersensitive. She is eating well and getting more energy (and getting more bored), so I think she will be up to socializing at the senior center soon. She is talking more about using the electric wheelchair and spending time with friends and family and enjoying life. One step at a time.